


A Snake in the Garden

by Lucifer111



Series: A Snake in the Garden [1]
Category: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Before Armageddon, Fluff, Ineffable Husbands (Good Omens), M/M, Snakes, inaccurate snake behavior
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-01
Updated: 2019-09-07
Packaged: 2020-10-04 10:57:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,131
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20469896
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lucifer111/pseuds/Lucifer111
Summary: “Crowly, it seems we might have had a misunderstanding. Could you just tell me whatever it is that's upset you, I’d be more than happy to explain or apologies?”'What? Misunderstanding? I’ve never talked to you before in my life!... wait, shit. he thinks I’m Crowly, not a snake.'~or~Crowly gets a pet snake that looks just like him. He then proceeds to go on a business trip and not tell Aziraphale, so he comes to visit.(just an FYI, I'm in the process of rewriting this because my writing style has changed a lot in the past year)





	1. Business Trip

**Author's Note:**

> tags may change as I write the story
> 
> minor changes have been and will be made as I continue to write

Crowly-

It was a Tuesday evening Just like any other, except, on this particular Tuesday evening a demon was walking down a British street that was home to none other than a small family-owned pet shop. This demons name, was Crowly. This demon wasn't your average demon; rather than tempting souls into Hell, his ideal afternoon was mildly inconveniencing everyone in his vicinity.

_Why must everything be so boring?_ He had asked himself just as his eyes landed on the aforementioned pet shop, more specifically, the snake that resided in its window. As of now, the snake is sunbathing, showing off the expanse of black scales that glisten in the sun, and if you look close enough you’ll see a hint of red peeking out from underneath its belly. The moment he laid eyes on the creature he knew he was going to keep it. The yellow-eyed man rushed into the shop, and twenty minutes later, he left with his brand new red-bellied black snake which he named, Crowley Jr.

When Crowley arrived home, he quickly got to work creating an expansive network of tubbing and shelves all around his plant room with Crowley Jr’s new terrarium residing in the middle, a gaping entrance in the side so he could slither in and out as he pleased.

Releasing Jr. into his new home was a different story; he was defensive and irritable, but Crowley wasn’t about to give up just yet. He felt a connection with the snake, that may or may not have to do with the fact that it looks almost exactly like he did back in the garden. He wouldn't give up, so he let Jr. alone in his new room, free to roam and explore. And Crowley would return tomorrow when it was time to water the plants.

“Crowley Jr.?” he asked when he returned the next morning, “where are you hiding?” Emerging into the room and quietly closing the door behind him, he started searching the room for his new son.

When he was located, he was found in the soil of the tallest tree in the room. “Hello again.” He said in an uncharacteristically polite voice. “I hope I didn’t overwhelm you yesterday. While this room is yours now, I still need to care for the plants in here.” he then stood from his crouch in the corner, picking up his plant mister, and started his routine.

Today when he left the room, he didn’t shout. In fact, the hadn't shouted the entire time he was tending to the plants, in an attempt to not startle Crowley Jr. he hoped that the snake would warm up to him soon, he didn’t want his plants to start dying on him. What most people don't know is that the demon cared deeply for anything under his care. And what his plants didn't know, is that when they were ‘removed’ from the main room, they were put into another. In the second room, the pants were treated positively and with the utmost care.

The next day when Crowly entered, he caught Jr. slithering across the floor towards his terrarium. In an attempt to respect his boundaries, Crowly sat down at the door, waiting to see what the snake would do, he didn’t have to meet with his angel till 4 and was currently noon, he had time to wait.

One thing that he and Jr. didn’t have in common was patients. While Crowly Jr. looked as if he could sit there for hours, Crowly the first couldn’t. So he started talking, as anyone would when introducing themself to a new family member. “So, right then, my names Crowly and I adopted you.” the snake seemed to perk up almost as he talked, almost as if acknowledging him. “Something you should know about me: I’m a demon, and not the emo kind, a literal demon who works in Hell.”

An awkward silence filled the air. At least with Aziraphale, it's comfortable, sometimes welcome. But now, he felt judged, as if his new son was staring into his (metaphorical) soul and picking him apart. But after what an eternity (1.75 minutes) the snake slowly moved closer, eventually coming into touching distance, but Crowly wasn’t entirely rude. Holding out his hand flat against the ground a few millimetres away from his head.

He hesitated, but soon enough Crowly Jr. was slithering his head onto his new father's hand. The moment was soon over however as he slithered off and into his terrarium._ Progress_ he thought.

Over the next few weeks, the two bonded slowly but surely. Mostly when Jr. realized that Crowly=food. However over those few weeks, Crowly had not mentioned his Crowly Jr. to Aziraphale at all; not wanting to be judged for his new friend, even though Crowly knew he wouldn’t. However, he has had some slip up’s, leading Aziraphale to think something up, but he hasn't mentioned it yet.

The head office needed him to come in for a week to make sure that he was doing what he needed to do, apparently, something big was about to happen but he wasn’t too worried, he was just wondering how he would care for Crowly II while he was gone. They had just warmed up to each other after all.

He gave the door a small knock, a new habit so Jr. isn’t startled by his presence. “Hey, Crowly JR. I needed to talk to you” he said as he sat down waiting for the snake to slither out from wherever he was hiding, once he did Crowly continued. “So I need to leave for a few days, the head office wants me. So you’ll be on your own. Is that alright?” he heald ou both his hands on the ground, a yes/no system they worked out early on.

Jr. went to his right hand, meaning no. “I don’t have a choice, I need to leave tomorrow, but I'll feed you a big meal before I go and when I get back ok?” he seemed to consider it, then moved to his left hand. Crowly smiled then slowly reached down to pick him up, wrapping him around his shoulders and began to tend to his plants.

It was the morning of Crowly’s departure and the only reason Jr. wasn’t attempting to block the door was that he was too busy eating, “see you in a few days Jr.” he calmly said as he closed the door behind him.

Aziraphale-

It had been two days and he hadn't heard a word from Crowly. So he decided to take it upon himself to check on the demon. He could be quite self-destructive at times. Walking into his home without permission seemed, dirty, but he was worried and Crowly had been in the bookshop dozens of times before calling ahead so it should be fine.

“Crowly?” he called through the door that housed his plants, knocking lightly before entering the room. “Are you in… here?” this question dies in his throat when he saw the ‘renovations’ a lavish terrarium sat in the middle of the room, filled with toys and a hide, along with a water dish. Throughout the room, tunnels and shelves lined the walls, as if meant to be a track for a reptile.

As if answering his question a graceful black snake slid out from the corner of the room, presumably roused from a deep sleep as it seemed to move sluggishly. However, once it saw the angel standing there, it puffed up and hissed defensively.

After a moment of observation, the gears clicked in Aziraphale’s head, “Crowly? Is this why you’ve been acting weird?” the blond asked as he extended his hands in front of him as an invitation to be held.


	2. Jr. Thinks their gay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A snake hide is basically their little cave  
when a snake 'tags' someone, they go to bite but then don't hold on

Crowley Jr.-

It was midafternoon when Jr. heard someone knock on the door, “Crowly? Are you in… here?” he had learned quickly that his owner named him Crowly Jr. or on occasions Crowly the II. Now sometimes he was called Jr. but he had never been called just Crowly, but he was too sleepy to question it, or why Crowly was back so early. He just moved out from under his favourite sleeping tree and headed towards him.

Funny thing is though, that wasn’t Crowly. Unless he had shrunk, gained a few pounds, and dyed his hair, that was not his father. “Crowly? Is this why you’ve been acting weird?” the intruder held out his hands as if expecting an answer. _Who is this guy, walking to my room and claiming to know who I am._ Jr. quickly decided that he didn’t like not knowing these things and so he reared up to tag the man but he quickly held his hands up in surrender.

Aziraphale-

Whatever Aziraphale had done he wasn’t aware of it. _What would possibly make him so upset?_ “Crowly, it seems we might have had a misunderstanding. Could you just tell me whatever it is that's upset you, I’d be more than happy to explain or apologies?” Crowly relaxed almost as if he were confused. After a short time, he calmed and slithered forward.

Crowley Jr.-

“Crowly, it seems we might have had a misunderstanding. Could you just tell me whatever it is that's upset you, I’d be more than happy to explain or apologies?” _What? Misunderstanding? I’ve never talked to you before in my life!... wait does he think that I’m Crowly? Coming in unannounced, acting like he knows me, calling me Crowly. Shit. he thinks I’m not really a snake._ In an attempt to communicate this with the man, he tried the only thing he knew, the yes/no hand system he used with his father.

Jr. slithered towards the man hoping he’d understand what he was trying to convey. Luckily the man outstretched both his hands like before, and Jr. slid into his right hand, merely resting his head in the other man's palm… nothing happened, he wasn’t responding. _I’m telling you no right now human, take the hint._ still no response. “Crowley, what are you doing?”

He did the snake equivalent of a facepalm then got up and slithered into his hide. _Why would he think I’m Crowly? Can he turn into a snake? If he can, why hasn't he?_ these were all thoughts that flooded Jr.’s head as he fell asleep.

Aziraphale-

“Crowley, I’m not leaving this house until we resolve this… right, you sleep on it.” for Aziraphale, it was strange to not have Crowley talking. He was so used to the constant noise aside from the few moments of content silence, that the quiet is unnerving.

_Well,_ he thought, _as a snake, he can’t right well take care of his garden, I suppose I’ll help._ and so, Aziraphale started watering all the plants, trimming any leaves that had spots or were starting to wither. After the gardens, he moved on to cleaning, sweeping around the place, filling the papers on his desk, and even changing the substrate of the terrarium.

When there was nothing left to clean he went and checked on Crowley, lifting the hide to see him sleeping peacefully. “Best not to disturb him,” Aziraphale muttered to himself, gently dropping the hide to let him rest.

Aziraphale was now faced with a problem. Where would he sleep? In Crowley's bed seemed too personal, there was the guest bed but he wasn’t technically a guest, and leaving before this was resolved was out of the question. “I suppose I’ll take the couch,” he said to no one imparticular; walking to the kitchen to start making tea.

It was dark out now, and Aziraphale had just turned out the last light in the flat. “I do hope we settle this soon,” and with that, he gets ready for bed.

Crowley Jr.-

_Hopefully this morning the stranger will be gone and I can wait for Crowley in peace_ Jr. thought just as the aforementioned stranger walked in. “Crowley? Are you awake yet?” a thought occurred to Jr as the man walked in _I wonder if this is the angel that Crowly keeps talking about?_

Over the few weeks that the two had known each other, Crowley had mentioned Aziraphale in the form of descriptions of his day, retellings of his past, and offhanded comments. However, throughout those accounts, Crowley had only ever called him ‘angel’ leading Crowley Jr. to the conclusion that 1. That was his name, and 2. They were forbidden lovers, and that's why they’ve never been introduced.

As he was thinking he only just realized that Angel had asked him a question. So he slithered from his hide to show that he was indeed awake, and in response, he held out his hands on the ground asking to hold the snake. Jr. figured that Angel was going to tend to plants again so he figured he would supervise.

Aziraphale-

Aziraphale was pleasantly surprised when Crowley accepted his invitation, picking him up and letting the snake get comfy on his shoulders as he got started on tending to the plants.

Now Aziraphale isn’t dumb, he had a plan. He knew that even on a good day Crowley would yell at him for being kind to his plants, and he figured, once he started talking they could go from there. But Crowly said nothing. Even when he let one of the smaller plants keep a wilted leaf, even when he watered the aloe a little too much. Whatever had upset Crowley, he wasn’t talking. And that is more terrifying than being rejected.

_Wait… did he find out? Is that why he’s mad at me? He knows, he knows I love him. That's why he's so upset, I’ve gone and ruined our friendship._ as Aziraphale’s mind started running wild the only thing Crowly(Jr.) was thinking was how much care Angel put into the garden, encouraging the plants with compliments and kind reassurances. ‘Sure he might have over-watered the aloe, but he probably just doesn't know what it is’

Setting down the mister, Aziraphale tried a more direct approach again “Crowley, whatever I’ve done I truly am sorry.” getting no response he continues. “Isn't just a little cruel to give me the silent treatment? I mean really, what could I have possibly done?” he was becoming frantic now spewing anything and everything that he could think of to try and get Crowley to talk.

“If you don’t at least tell me why you’re mad, I’ll- I’ll never talk to you again.” Aziraphale threatened even though he knew that was an empty promise. He lifted Crowley from his shoulders, holding him as to look him in the eye. “Please,” he said, barely a whisper, chocking on the frog in his throat.

Crowley-

It had been about four days since he had left for head office, and can't remember more than ten minutes of it. _I can’t wait to see Jr. he probably misses me_ Crowley thought as he walked into his flat. Much preferring this space over the dull grays and rancid odder of Hell.

He intended to walk in, put his stuff down, and then check on Jr. but he heard noises coming from the plant room. And not the normal shaking, hissing, maybe a few things being knocked over. But these were distinctly human noises coming from behind the closed door.

As quietly as he could, Crowley set down his bags and let the door swing open. The sight he saw before him, was one he never would have dreamt of in a million years. It was Aziraphale, kneeling on the floor, holding Jr. closely to his chest. He couldn’t see his face, but by the sound of his voice, he was crying.

“Crowley dear, please, say something. I’m sorry. I can’t bear not hearing your voice, I- I love you. Please, say something.” Crowley didn’t know what was happening, and Aziraphale’s confession hadn't registered in his mind yet, so his only reaction was to clear his throat.

Aziraphale stiffened immediately, slowly turning around to look at (the real) Crowley. “But, you, what?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please leave comments! I'd love to hear how you think the story will end (cause I have no clue right now) and I have no guarantees for when the next chapter will be uploaded or how long it will be


	3. They're gay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry this is so short, but I had the big writer's block and my brain was doing that thing where it didn't want to finish the thing

Aziraphale-

Hearing a noise coming from behind, Aziraphale froze. If it was an intruder, well, he really didn’t want Crowley's plants to fear him. Slowly turning around as to not startle whoever it was, he saw: Crowley? “But, you, what?” Aziraphale was equal parts relieved and horrified. “Wait, if you’re there… then who’s this?” he said, gesturing to the creature in his hands.

After a few moments of petrified silence, a soft almost inaudible whisper was heard, “you love me?” and at that moment Crowley saw exactly how red an angel’s face could get.

“W-well um I… yes” it was Crowley's turn to go red. You might wonder, ‘how do demons deal with problems?’ normally they destroy whatever's causing it. This demon just ignores them, so Crowley quickly changes the topic.

“So what are you doing here angel?” he asked, turning away from Aziraphale’s gaze. “Shouldn't you be at your bookshop?”

“Well I hadn't heard from you in a few days, and I was worried… then I come in here and find him” he gestured to the snake “what was I supposed to think” the snake in question started wiggling, clearly trying to break free from Aziraphale’s hold.

Crowley-

“Let him come here,” Crowley said as he held out his hands. Aziraphale complied, releasing Jr. “Are you ok?” Crowley asked and Jr. slithered to his left hand, yes. “That’s good”

Aziraphale was confused “Can you talk to snakes?” he wondered aloud. “No, but we worked out a system. Left hand, yes. Right hand no…. So this is Crowley Jr. or Crowley the 2nd when I’m feeling fancy… I- I’m... I didn’t mean to make you worry.” he stuttered out; sitting so he was on the same level as Aziraphale.

“Well… say somethi-” Crowley was shocked as Aziraphale launched himself in Crowley's direction, wrapping him in a fixed embrace.

“You stupid demon, I thought I did something, or you hated me or-” Crowley never had good impulse control, so he figured he’d kill three birds with one stone. Crowley kissed Aziraphale, and with that kiss, he poured out the emotions he had bottled up for the past six thousand years. It was chaste, and as soon as it started, it was over.

When Crowley pulled away Aziraphale was breathless, and, to be fair, so was Crowley. The emotional whiplash of the past minute left them both speechless.

Aziraphale-

The emotions running through Aziraphale’s head were ineffable. So when Crowley pulled away, the only thing he could say was: “so… you’re not mad at me?” Crowley’s laugh was, ironically, the purest thing the angel had ever heard.

“Angel,” he said, moving impossibly closer “I could never be mad at you”


End file.
